It is good to remember that light and darkness cannot be separated. There is always a little glimpse of the other.
When life runs like a well-oiled machine, and things are going our way, confidence is high, and joy is palpable. It is then that we begin to feel invincible—that this good fortune is what we deserve. When the inevitable challenges, losses, or setbacks come, we feel the wind knocked out of our sails.
On the other hand, to succumb to darkness, despair, or hopelessness is to snuff out the candle of hope that we must cling to, or what is this all for? Being Benedictine means holding both/and—seeking the light while also honoring and learning from the darkness.
“When we come to understand that everything in our world, including its darker aspects, derives from God, we begin to realize that much of what we perceive as “bad” is, from the divine perspective, simply another piece of the sacred whole…that which appears as darkness to us may very well be the beacon to our redemption.” -Niles Elliot Goldstein, God at the Edge
My guiding star, my 2025 Word of the Year, LIGHT, has helped me embrace this yin/yang reality in my life and the world.
It is no secret that 2025 has been a tough year. We knew it wouldn’t be easy, but it has felt more…well, just more than we could have imagined. (See truth-tellers like Heather Cox Richardson, Robert Reich, Rebecca Solnit, Parker Palmer, and Pope Leo who shine their light into the darkness of a threatened democracy, giving hope to those marginalized and suffering around the world. I have shared my truth on these matters here: Be The Light: A 4th of July Message.)
Personally, we started 2025 with unexpected news, challenges, and worries about family and friends. We lost Joe’s brother, Steve, in a tragic accident, but were comforted that two successful transplant surgeries resulted from his donated organs.
I missed my teacher colleagues in my first full year of retirement, but had more time for reading and writing, coffee and lunch dates, book discussions, and binge-watching Outlander. I attended the Okoboji Writers Retreat, led two SoulFully You retreats, and collaborated on another.
We enjoyed good health for travel and time spent in nature—almost three weeks in Ireland with dear friends, a half-dozen visits to see our daughter and son-in-law in Wisconsin, a long weekend in New York City with book-loving friends to visit the Morgan Library, and a 2-hour trip down I-80 in Nebraska to see the breathtaking sunsets and sunrises during the sandhill crane migration along the Platte River.
We ended the year with knee replacement surgery for my husband, Joe, a second surgical procedure in six months, both requiring more time healing than originally expected. Finally, after years of pain, physical therapy, and cortisone shots, Joe has a new knee. Ordinary tasks have been painful for him, and, at first, he required help with nearly everything—showering, ice packs, changing bandages, putting on support hose and socks, doing exercises, going to physical therapy, and counting out pain medication (unfortunately, still needed).
Our days are simple. We have eggs for breakfast (sometimes French toast), lunch, and dinner; we take naps, watch TV, and take care of each other. The calendar has been cleared of all obligations—and that is a relief. Although exhausted, it is lovely to be able to slow down when we need to and just be together. Typically, I am well cared for by my husband (my friends might think I am a little spoiled). Joe plans meals, shops for groceries, cooks, cleans, and does lots of thoughtful extras, like making my coffee every morning, even though he doesn’t drink it. Joe is a generous giver, so it has been a joy to return the care he has given me in 40 years of marriage, especially when I broke my arm! It can be humbling to need help, but Joe is learning that it is good to also receive.
We have been light-bearers for each other, just as our friends and family have been for us. Choosing LIGHT as my word of the year has been a gift of seeing with new eyes, with light threading its way through the reflections shared here and on Substack. I am more conscious of how essential it is for each of us to shine our light and so grateful for those who do.
Some of my 2025 favorites that poignantly hold the tension between light and darkness:
Stephen Colbert’s Late Show and Jimmy Kimmel Live— because 2025 wouldn’t have been survivable without their courage and humor, required virtues these days.
Good Bye, June — Netflix drama/comedy about love, loss, and family dynamics. Amazing acting and screenplay. Incredible cast-Kate Winslet, Helen Mirren, Toni Collette. Directed by Kate Winslet, screenplay written by her son Joe Anders.
Song Sung Blue — a 2025 movie telling the true story of Milwaukee couple Mike & Claire Sardina, who performed as the beloved Neil Diamond tribute band Lightning & Thunder. Starring Hugh Jackman and Kate Hudson who perform a dozen Neil Diamond classics. The film, based on a 2009 documentary, follows their real-life journey from local fame to hardships, including a life-altering accident, proving that it’s never too late to find love and follow your dreams.
Parable of the Sower—The most important book I read in 2025, a dystopian novel by Octavia Butler, written in 1993, set in the future, 2025. This book, although disturbing, holds many insights for our present moment and clues to survival in times of distress. We must name the darkness in the world and within us.
The Growing Edge podcast with Parker Palmer and Carrie Newcomer—each guest interviewed brings light through their writing, song, or creativity. Highly recommend: “Podcast Episode 63: A Conversation With Author Christy Berghoef – The Nature of Belonging & Being Rooted”
Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer—daily poems come directly to your in-box. I start my morning with her beautiful poetry at A Hundred Falling Veils.
May light shine upon you in the new year! 2026 Word of the Year coming soon!
Being Benedictine 
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